There is a tall, thin high school freshman with big blue eyes and shaggy dark hair. He appears to have it all, good looks, confidence, and a strong sense of self. However, if you look closely under his mop of hair, he wears hearing aids. It is the only physical sign of his hearing impairment which has been a source of discrimination and bullying throughout his younger years. In his own words, “I am hearing impaired and because of that I have a speech impediment and been bullied for it” (01:03). Thankfully he had the support to overcome his hearing impairment, a luxury that was not afforded to the those like him, or in similar predicaments, throughout history. For proof, look no further than Nazi Occupied Germany. In their attempt to fulfill their vision of a perfect society, they discriminated against those with physical and mental differences or disabilities through sterilization and systematic killing.
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The young man in the story above is not some fictional character in an anecdotal story designed to highlight the all-encompassing nature of the Nazi’s destruction of life. He is a living human being. He is my younger brother, which amazes me because he is hearing impaired and I have perfect hearing. He has been hearing impaired since the day he was born. He started having ear infections starting as early as six months. Between the ages of nine months and seven years old he had seven ear surgeries. He has also had multiple vestibular tubes, close to a dozen, inserted into his ears in an attempt to limit his number of ear infections. He said, “I have been in speech therapy since before he can remember” (1:35). This was done to improve his speech, which was impaired as a result of not being able to hear. Dealing with the complications and health issues that come with having poor ears was such a commonplace part of his life, he and his parents didn’t realize he was hearing impaired until second grade. He explained, “I didn’t know I was hearing impaired because it is how I always heard. I didn’t realize it until second grade when we started doing a bunch of spelling tests and it got very difficult for me and I wasn’t doing very well” (01:35).
Two questions must be asked in order to understand why this would occur. The first being why would they do this? Are they intentionally malicious, and believe that people different than themselves are inferior, or do they simply not know better? If they do not know better is it because they are a byproduct of an ignorant environment? The second being what triggered these individuals to act out in this way? Was it because the hearing aids formally marked their classmate, my younger brother, as different and therefore he was an easy target, or rather was it because the hearing aids were unique to him and marked him as an individual in a sea of conformity and therefore made them (the perpetrators) uncomfortable?
The bullying and discrimination he faced was multi-faceted. “I was left out of game and from playing,” he reflected. “They would play kickball, football, and basketball and they wouldn’t let me play. If I tried to play, they would start making fun of me and then make sure I never got to touch the ball” (08:03).
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He thought back to a specific time in fifth grade and remembers the mental impact the discrimination took. “There were these twins,” he said, “they started making fun of the fact that I wore hearing aids. They started being really mean, like verbally abusive and I just ended up getting actually depressed” (4:32). Because I have an identical twin brother as well, I can speak to why these twins might have bullied him. As a twin, you feel constantly compared. At times it can feel like a competition to see who the superior copy is because people forget that even though you look the same, does not mean you are the same people. Therefore, these twins might have bullied because they felt resentment that they were not treated with respect to the fact they are unique individuals.
The bullying affected many aspects of his life, including his physical and mental health. He came to believe that perhaps he really wasn’t equal to his peers. “I felt bad, like something was wrong with me, like something was wrong with me, like it was all my fault. Why is this wrong with me. Why are they so much better than me?” (05:41).
The psychological stress caused him to be ill frequently. Ultimately, bullying and discrimination affected his mental and physical health to the point that he needed to switch schools. And he did just that between fifth and sixth grade. The difference that being in an environment where he was accepted for who he was, regardless of the fact he had a physical disability, was monumental. “I moved schools and I started becoming self-dependent,” he recalled. “It made me realize that my hearing is not something I have any control over, so screw what they think. I am my own human being. I am my own person. I can be whoever I want to be, and it doesn’t matter what others think” (15:07).
Four years later, as a freshman in high school, he is in a much better space mentally and physically. He has accepted and embraced the fact he is hearing-impaired, “I look back on the time where I was bullied as a very dark time, but there is a part of me that is very thankful for it because it helped me grow as a person and made me stand up for myself” (06:31).
He said his battle with discrimination helped make him a better person, “I would say I would not be the same person if I didn’t go through it, and I wouldn’t get rid of it because it gives me my individuality. I just wish I had moved to a more supportive place sooner” (14:03). He also stated it helped him learn a number of life lessons, “Being hearing impaired has helped me weed out the people who say they are my friends but actually are not. The people who [see past my hearing and speech] are such great friends. They like me for who I am, the person I am, not my abilities or what I have” (12:53).
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He said his battle with discrimination helped make him a better person, “I would say I would not be the same person if I didn’t go through it, and I wouldn’t get rid of it because it gives me my individuality. I just wish I had moved to a more supportive place sooner” (14:03). He also stated it helped him learn a number of life lessons, “Being hearing impaired has helped me weed out the people who say they are my friends but actually are not. The people who [see past my hearing and speech] are such great friends. They like me for who I am, the person I am, not my abilities or what I have” (12:53). He added that anyone who was or is in a similar situation is “to not listen to other people. Who cares what they think, don’t worry about them. Be the best you that you can be” (15:07).