Artist’s Statement
It is important to know the context of Montse Mendez’ story in order to better relate and understand the lyrics of this song. My sister and interviewee, Montse, has many marginalized identities including being Mexican, a woman, and bisexual. Although Montse’s other identities also affect her in everyday life, the focus of this song is the way Montse has been treated because of her bisexuality. The first verse begins providing a little bit of context of her specific incident. This is where I address Montse’s coming out story, and the fear and confusion she felt then. She shared with me that when she was first coming out to people she felt “vulnerable and scared” (11:24), and that she did not know how people would think about her.
I felt like this was important to add because it shows that her self esteem was not in a good place prior to the incident. The pre-chorus and chorus then begin describing the specific incident, which took place on tinder with a man that Montse matched with. Montse was beginning to embrace her identity more and openly shared her sexuality with this man. The man’s first reaction was to say ,“That’s hot. Can you teach me how to make my girlfriend cum?” as an opening line. This overtly sexual approach is not only rude, but also offensive. The label “bisexual” seems to have a deep effect on society’s perception on the person. Instead of focusing on any other aspect of that person, they are immediately sexualized even though, just like a straight person, they have other attributes. I chose to use the chorus as a way to explain my perspective on bisexuality and how it is simply about who people feel romantic love towards. Since everyone feels romantic love, I hope that this humanizes bisexual people to those who hypersexualize them and can relate better to how they feel. Harmonically speaking, I picked a minor key in order to match the serious tone of the subject. I also picked chords with some notes that clash and may sound “crunchy” to go with this mood, and also match the contemporary style that most artists use today.
Song Lyrics
Chorus 1
eb 9
Bisexuality isn’t a pornographic movie (13:31)
Gb maj 7
It’s not a trend, or a mental disability
B maj 7
My sexuality isn’t about you, or how to make your girlfriend come (11:24)
Bb 7
It’s about love and who I put my feelings on
Verse 1
You didn’t she was scared and self conscious (11:24)
She wondered, is this real or is this fictitious?
Growing up she saw it as a negative (2:12)
Her friends and family told her being straight was imperative
Pre-Chorus
But when we matched and then you messaged me (11:24)
You didn’t ask about my major, my degree
My heritage or family
You’d rather gain from my sexuality
Chorus 1
eb 9
Bisexuality isn’t a pornographic movie (13:31)
Gb maj 7
It’s not a trend, or a mental disability
B maj 7
My sexuality isn’t about you, or how to make your girlfriend come (11:24)
Bb 7
It’s about love and who I put my feelings on
Those that differ from heterosexuality today, specifically females, are oversexualized in our society. The author of this post, Martin Mendez, has written a song about his sister who has had experiences with this issue in our society. This can be linked to the male vs female experience in the concentration camps during the holocaust. According to an article written by Dalina Ofer and Lenore J. Weitzman(linked below), women were much more likely to be sexually assaulted, and sterilized by German scientists. It is important to understand that describing the differences between male and female suffering is not stating that one suffering was worse than another, simply that they were treated differently then the males. In connection to Martin’s piece, identifying as homosexual/bisexual as a women is treated very differently as a society, as women are more sexualized. This is not to say that women suffer more in coming out as homosexual men, just stating that they are different experiences. Martin’s work can help express the feelings of those who identify like his sister, and can help society become more aware of the differences between the two.
“Women in the Holocaust.” Jewish Women’s Archive, jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/women-in-holocaust.
There are people out there that still find the characteristic of being bisexual disgusting, unholy, or “sexy”. An example of such fantasies is a male wishing for two females to commit to sexual acts with each other with the goal of arousing him. Martin Mendez Higuera wrote a song against such beliefs in defense of his interviewee and sister, Montse, who unfortunately had experienced such grotesque commentary first-hand. Hypersexualizing a human being based on their sexuality is a display of a lack of empathy and respect for that human being, something that society has seen in many ways, especially in World War II. According to an article in the website Holocaust Encyclopedia, “The regime frequently subjected women, however, both Jewish and non-Jewish, to brutal persecution that was sometimes unique to the gender of the victims.”. Women had to go through terrible experiences, from executions to sexual assault, and other morally questionable acts such as experiments on them. Even as our society developed and our morals grew stronger, we can still witness and experience the lack of care people have for others, both physically and emotionally.
“Women During the Holocaust” https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/women-during-the-holocaust. Accessed April 26th, 2019
In today’s society people seem to dehumanize anyone who goes against the norm. People who are bisexual are treated as if they are some sort of different species just based on what gender they are attracted to. In Martin Mendez’s song where he displays societies perception on bisexuality it talks about how his sister bisexual and has had to face hardships with being bisexual. At first, she didn’t know how to feel about it because of her fear of being treated differently due to the world not being completely accepting of it. Once she became open about it she eventually came across a tinder match with some guy. She openly told him about her bisexuality and the guys initial instinct was to say “That’s hot. Can you teach me how to make my girlfriend cum?”. This comment was made because he felt that she was lesser of a human than him, and he thought that justified the comment. However rude comments like that are never justified, because there is nothing wrong with being bisexual, It is just a feeling that she can’t help. Likewise in our Nazi-Occupied Europe class we have learned how the Nazis would treat Jewish people like they are under them just because of their religion. This act of dehumanizing people based on their identity is wrong because they still look, act, and talk like everyone else, but it is the social norms in today’s society that makes people treat them poorly. I believe if people were more aware of this poor treatment and took a stand, it would prevent it, and make more people comfortable with who they really are as an individual.