I don’t know about you, but I have found this election cycle to be brutal. No matter whose team you’re playing on, the tenor of the “conversations” has been strident, personally insulting, and, in my opinion, way beneath the level of political discourse I believe we should have in a civilized, democratic nation.

You may work with one or more people on the other side of the political fence from you. If you’re working in a department where civility is the norm, you may avoid talking politics, or do so in ways that allow for constructive, informative dialogue. Unfortunately, many departments are not as enlightened. Without the skills for meaningful, collegial dialogue, these deep-seated feelings and beliefs will likely lead to anger, anxiety, or withdrawal.

In her blog post entitled, “Leading in the Age of Trump and #BlackLivesMatter” (http://www.workforce.com/2016/10/25/leading-age-trump-blacklivesmatter/), Susana Rinderle lists several points that can be helpful in navigating these murky and potentially rough waters:

1. When inclusivity is practiced correctly, the underlying theme is: “inclusion means everyone is included.” That means supporters of either candidate should be treated with dignity and respect.
2. Inclusion doesn’t mean any behavior is acceptable – obviously, it’s not. You can’t change others’ strongly held beliefs, but it is possible to hold others accountable for inappropriate behaviors.
3. What do you want to be remembered for? Being a hot-headed, vociferous partisan, or someone who evenhandedly listens, keeps volatile opinions within, and focuses on the work and constructive relationships?
4. If you are in a “hot” conversation with someone who disagrees with you, often the best strategy is to go for facts. Diving down into the “why’s” and “what’s” defining the opinions may switch the conversation from a heated to a more impartial exchange of data.
5. Listen for understanding. It’s hard to do that when emotions are running high, but perhaps if you truly understand the other person’s arguments, you will be better able to deal with this conflict. And if we can deal with political conflict, other types of conflict will be a breeze!
6. Listening and identifying facts takes curiosity. Getting curious about what’s going on, over and above your own emotions, may turn what might have been a heated, dysfunctional shouting match into a meaningful conversation.

The good news is that we’re less than a week away from the election. The bad news is that the rhetoric and negative feelings will persist. Perhaps the best we can do is to model civil conversations and hope they trickle up to influence the next two presidential candidates. After all, we have four years!

Does this kind of situation sound familiar? Your department is moving offices. You really want the corner space – it’s got great windows and more room. However, even though you have a couple of years’ seniority over him, another colleague has been assigned the corner. You bring it up to your department chair, and she says it’s because he’s directing the undergraduate program. But, you think to yourself, I directed that program for three years and didn’t get a premium office. Of course, you reflect, your department wasn’t moving then. But on the other hand, your department chair and the new “corner-office-guy” are in the same discipline – could there be some favoritism going on? Generally, she’s pretty fair. But still . . . You think, “Gee, it would be nice to talk to a neutral person about this.”

UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson provides a neutral and impartial avenue to whom such questions can be brought. In my last blog post, I discussed the Ombud’s Standard of “Confidentiality.” This time, I’d like to cover “neutrality and impartiality.”

The International Association of Ombudsman’s Standard of Neutrality and Impartiality states, “The Ombudsman strives for impartiality, fairness, and objectivity in the treatment of people and the consideration of issues. The Ombudsman advocates for fair and equitably administered processes and does not advocate on behalf of any individual within the organization.”

There are a couple of important points to make here. First, if you came to me with your office space issue, I would listen to your story, help clarify your goal regarding the issue, and then help you generate options you might take to achieve your goal. Throughout this process, I won’t take sides – I won’t defend the department chair’s position, and I won’t tell you you’re right.

Neutrality allows all sides to be treated fairly and impartially. It’s not up to me to say who’s right. My job is to help you navigate the situation so you get the best outcome you can. Of course I can’t get you the corner office, but I could help you strategize discussions with your chair, investigate university policies around office allocations, or do other things that might clarify the situation and show you what your options are.

Second, as a neutral person, I can’t tell you what you should do, and I can’t tell your department chair who should get which office. My ombuds activities are outside any compliance process within the system. I don’t have a stake in how your issue is resolved.

Even though I’m a neutral party, I try to be as empathetic as I can. Since I’m a faculty member as well as an ombuds, I usually understand the issues, conflicts, and consequences that faculty face. Since I’ve been an administrator, I also know the pressures and constraints around which your department chair may be working. I try to use this knowledge to help you generate your best response to the issue.

Sometimes what faculty want is just an ear to listen. My goal is that by being a neutral and impartial listener, I can help you resolve your issues in efficient, productive, and civil ways.

So if you want to chat with a neutral and impartial person to try to resolve any work-related issue, please contact me at facultyombuds@umkc.edu. You can find more information on the Faculty Ombuds website.

Welcome back to the new semester! As UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson – and a Bloch School faculty member – I know first-hand the excitement, creativity, tedium, and inevitability you may be feeling right now. The students are new and different, but at the same time, pretty similar to last semester. You may be teaching the same course, but perhaps changed things up a bit, or you may be swamped with all the effort of a new prep. And inter- and intra-department issues may be energizing, interesting, disrupting, or downright debilitating.

Our jobs as faculty can be among the most satisfying – at least in terms of Hackman and Oldham’s (1975) Job Characteristics Model. We use a lot of different skills, often find our work meaningful, and we have a great deal of autonomy. BUT – our jobs can also be among the most stressful: publication pressures, student demands, and difficulties working with colleagues, both other faculty and administrators.

If you find yourself caught in a situation you’re not sure how to navigate, the Faculty Ombudsperson is here to help. I try to understand your story, clarify your goals, help generate options that may resolve the issue, and assist you in planning your next steps.

As a member of the International Ombudsman Association, I adhere to four Standards of Practice: Informality, neutrality/impartiality, independence, and confidentiality. In this blog I’d like to explain what all mean, starting with confidentiality.

Confidentiality means I won’t divulge what you tell me to anyone. This is critical so that my visitors feel they can be candid and complete in telling their stories. Like all organizational Ombuds, I keep no records, so there’s nothing that will come up in any legal discovery process. (Although, as you know, UMKC’s email and voicemail communications can’t be considered confidential.) Also, the only people who will know about your visit are you and me, unless you choose to tell someone else. The confidentiality standard requires I neither confirm nor deny who’s been to see me.

Obviously, to effectively help Ombuds visitors, confidentiality is critical, and exceptions to it are very limited: If I believe there is “imminent risk of serious harm to an individual or the University,” I need to report that to the appropriate person. Also, if it’s clear you’re reporting illegal discrimination or harassment, I’m required to contact UMKC’s Office of Affirmative Action. In my nearly six years as Faculty Ombuds, very, very few visitors have fallen into either of these “exceptional” categories.

As Ombuds, my goal is that by telling me your story, you’ll have both a clearer understanding of the situation and some ideas about how to move forward in a positive direction. In my next few blog posts, I’ll explain the other Standards of Practice.

So if you want an avenue to confidentially try to resolve any work-related issue, please contact me at facultyombuds@umkc.edu. You can find more information on the Faculty Ombuds website.

Writing a post in my UMKC Ombuds Blog was on my January “to-do” list. Probably like you, I’ve been swamped. It’s only gotten worse now as the semester’s end is approaching. Luckily, no one has his/her life on hold waiting for my next blog post, so no harm, no foul. But the blog is an important venue to get the word out about my faculty ombuds practice. It should have been be done by now. Along with a whole bunch of other things. In other words, I could be on the road to  burning out.

It’s a common malady this time of the semester. All the department’s unfinished projects are being pushed through, summer and fall classes have to be planned, our performance appraisals have to be completed, and of course the grading, oh, the grading. We need to intervene in our own lives before we reach total meltdown. How can we do this?

First, diagnosis. Burnout is an extreme form of stress, characterized by feeling disengaged, helpless, and out of control. According to Vanessa Loder of Forbes online, if you’re experiencing a combination of three or more of these 13 signs of early burnout, it’s time to take action:

• High levels of stress or anxiety.
• Lack of engagement, feeling unmotivated, maybe having a short attention span.
• Increased cynicism, resentment or feeling disconnected.
• Distracted eating.
• Not getting enough sleep.
• Low energy, fatigue or exhaustion.
• Feeling as thought you’re always behind.
• Worrying excessively and being constantly self-critical.
• Physically sick.
• Feeling numb, depending on caffeine, sugar, food, alcohol, or drugs to relieve stress.
• Feeling like you’re not accomplishing as much as you should.
• Not taking breaks during the day, relaxing on weekends, missing vacations.
• Not exercising enough.

What to do? The following useful tips are from HelpGuide.org, a website dedicated to improving health and happiness:

• Begin your day with relaxation, such as journaling, meditating, or stretching.
• Engage in healthy behaviors, such as good eating, regular exercise, ensuring you do everything to get a good night’s sleep.
• Learn to say “no.” Set boundaries. This is hard for many of us and takes practice.. To improve your “saying no” skills, you might practice saying “no” to something every day, even something as small as, “no, I’m not going to stay an extra 15 minutes after class today.”
• Set a time every day away from technology. No laptop, phone, e-tablet, email, etc. Even 30 minutes will help.
• Do something creative, new and/or fun. You’ll feel more energetic. Just make sure it’s totally unrelated to work.

Consider the best way for you to handle stress. For example, UMKC offers training in mindfulness and other activities. If you have trouble managing burnout yourself, UMKC offers an Employee Assistance Program in which trained counselors assist you, If you have work-related issues contributing to your stress that are in need of resolution, consider contacting me at the Faculty Ombuds office.

Good luck – to us all – in finishing the semester with a smile!

I’ve just read a blog post from  folks who contributed to the “Crucial Conversations” series of books. They are smart, compassionate, and creative people who base their recommendations on practical research. In their post, “How to Avoid Social Backlash in the Workplace,” they cite research about how women’s forceful comments are more negatively evaluated than the same comments made by men (by both women and men, by the way). The authors advise women to state assertive comments through either a behavioral frame (“I’m going to express my opinion very directly. I’ll be as specific as possible.”), or a value frame (“I see this as a matter of honesty and integrity, so it’s important for me to be clear about where I stand.”).

These guys aren’t being sexist. They’re providing tips to women to succeed in the real world of work. In fact, there are several streams of research in social psychology that affirm this same phenomenon: Assertive, forceful men are seen as masterful and competent; assertive, forceful women are seen as domineering and aggressive.

Before I became an academic, I was an HR consultant in a practice group consisting of three men and me. They were great guys; one was a friend from graduate school. But it was not an infrequent occurrence that as we’d brainstorm solutions to a client issue I would introduce what I thought was a great idea – and it would fall flat. Five minutes later one of the men would suggest the same idea, and they all agreed it was genius. Yes, this was a couple of decades ago, but when I tell this story to my women graduate students, there are a lot of nods. It’s definitely still an issue – we’ve come only a little way, baby.

It’s good to be angry about all this, especially if you’re a woman. Really, any human concerned with fairness and merit-based treatment should be disconcerted, to say the least. So please join me in a giant, muscle-straining frown and growl for the next 30 seconds.

OK, let’s move on. The fact is the world we live in is the only one available right now. If we want to do the work we want to do, we’re going to have to figure out how to politically navigate its waters, whether we’re female or male. That means being sensitive and realistic about how we’re perceived and move forward.

In the Crucial Conversations framework, this can be accomplished in part by:

• Starting with heart – Know what you want (probably to be heard and understood) and what you don’t want (to be ignored or resented because you’re “aggressive”).
• Learning to look – Be aware of the context and conditions: Are others in a place where they could feel easily threatened? What’s your history and level of trust with them?
• Making it safe – Make it clear your goal is not to be overbearing and you respect others’ opinions.
• Mastering your story – Know what you want to say and how to say it clearly.
• Stating your path – Be clear about what you suggest as next steps.

I hope for social change. I try to set an example of being a strong, assertive, approachable, and compassionate woman (I don’t always succeed). I hope our daughters or granddaughters or even great-granddaughters will have an easier row to hoe. But for now, let’s work to thrive in the world we have, however imperfect.

In the last few weeks, we’ve seen two disturbing shootings at college campuses. We’ve probably all wondered whether this kind of violence could happen at UMKC – it’s worrying, to say the least. People who’ve lived through these appalling events must work through extreme levels of stress.

Thankfully, the odds of experiencing a mass shooting are low. What’s much more likely is that our day-to-day work demands create ongoing, chronic stress that eats away at our productivity, energy, and intrinsic satisfaction. The better we learn to cope with stress, the more we can enjoy work and life.

An important key to coping with stress is resiliency. Being resilient means having the skills and abilities to move through difficult, stressful times and thrive. It’s discussed in organizational behavior textbooks and researched by top scholars in psychology and business. Resilient faculty are better able to bounce back from set-backs, deal better with ambiguity, and respond to constant change and multiple demands.

What is resiliency? Resilient faculty:

• Are optimistic
• Have a sense of humor
• Are adaptable in changing times
• Manage negative feelings by using positive coping skills
• Have fun
• Build close relationships
• Seek support both in getting things done and getting emotional support
• See stress as an opportunity to learn and grow
• Recognize there’s a limit to what they can control
• Apply skills and abilities to make decisions and control outcomes, where possible
• Plan their actions
• Are able to find meaning or coherence in work and life
• Have a sense of spirituality in a broad sense – they search for meaning and purpose

How resilient are you? If you’re interested, this link, from the National Center for the Victims of Crime, takes you to a self-test that assesses your resiliency.

What if your feelings of work-related stress are overwhelming your resiliency? UMKC offers several avenues to help:

• UMKC Counseling Center – can help you manage psychological implications of work-related stress.
• UMKC’s EAP (Employee Assistance Program) – provides services to help address personal issues affecting your work life.
• UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson – My office is a confidential first step in figuring out the best resolution option for any workplace problem. Visit umkc.edu/facultyombuds for more information about what an ombuds is and how I can be helpful.

If I was going to give UMKC department chairs, assistant/associate deans, deans and all supervisors one piece of advice to improve their relationships with their faculty, it would be this: Answer your email!

Imagine this scenario: A discontented faculty member feels (choose one or more) disrespected, disgruntled, discouraged, disincentivized, disrupted, or any other relevant “dis.” So she spends 30 to 45 minutes crafting an email expressing her thoughts to Dr. X, her department chair (or dean, etc.), in an effort to feel more respected, encouraged, and capable of doing her job. If she is a sensitive and skilled communicator (as many faculty are), she probably will agonize over the wording and worry about how her email might come across. But she is also hopeful – this is the person who can make a difference!

The faculty member waits. She checks email hourly – at least more frequently than usual. She waits some more. And waits some more. Several days later she may casually ask the admin assistant if Dr. X is out of town? Perhaps ill? Unable to check email due to some unforeseen and obscure medical condition? No? So back to waiting.

Often, after variable amounts of time, this faculty member makes it to my office. The original complaint is still boiling, but it’s now compounded. She is still disrespected, disgruntled, discouraged, disincentivized, and/or disrupted, but now has been soundly IGNORED. I think you see where this is going. A more timely response from Dr. X most likely would have moved the issue along the path toward resolution.

So, to reiterate: Department chairs (etc.): Please answer your email.

I know you get too much email. I’ve been a department chair before. I understand the problem. But believe me, in the long run, responding quickly, respectfully, and honestly to your discontented faculty member is a time-saver.

Obviously, if a faculty member is doing the equivalent of e-stalking you, or “bullying up” (meaning frequent, repeated, and abusive emails), then it’s a different issue. But a civil, reasonable email with potentially valid complaints needs to be taken seriously and responded to promptly.

But how do you get through all those blasted emails? Here are a few tips that may help from Tina Sieber (http://www.makeuseof.com/tag/7-email-efficiency-tips-to-get-more-done/) and me.

1. Schedule time for email. Adding a couple of slots into your daily schedule to answer email gives you time to process which are important, which not, and prioritize your replies. If two slots a day doesn’t work, you might try five minutes every two hours – or once at the end of the day – whatever works best for you. Over time as you hone in on the best schedule, you should build efficiency.

Emails from people who depend on you (like a faculty member) should probably be top priority. Even if you don’t have time for a long, thoughtful response at that moment, an acknowledgement that you received the email, know it’s important, and intend to respond in a thoughtful way will go a long way to make him feel listened to and valued. If you can, ensure him you’ll respond by a specific date and time (and of course, follow through).

2. Act on every email you open. If you can’t clear it up immediately (see above), create an Outlook task (you can drag and drop them into your task list) to complete later. Include a “reminder” in the task so your computer or phone pings you when it’s time to act.

3. Have your email system filter and sort emails. Organize your inbox by setting up your email system up so certain senders’ messages are sent to specific folders. If you get association newsletters, for example, you can set up a “reading matter” folder. Having a folder for “key constituents,” like the faculty who report to you, can help you know which folders to address first.

4. Reduce incoming email by eliminating the ones you don’t need or want. Take an extra few second to unsubscribe from recurrent emails you don’t read. Ask others to copy you only on critical issues. Advise your staff and faculty that “reply all” is appropriate in only limited circumstances. Consider adding a quick agenda item to your faculty meetings about email etiquette, especially who needs to get what, and when.

5. Keep your own emails brief and clear. A clear, succinct subject line helps identify the reason for the message. Make messages as brief as you can. If your email is several paragraphs long, consider delivering your message through a different, “richer,” more appropriate and effective medium, like a phone call or short in-person (or Skype) meeting.

6. Editing your emails before you send them is important for several reasons:

• Email is a “lean” medium, meaning sensitive nuances we share in person are absent. Thus, wording is critical to ensure the recipient doesn’t misunderstand your intentions.
• It will save the recipient time if s/he doesn’t have to ponder over what it is you mean; this will save you time since the recipient won’t need to start a long email chain of “did you mean . . .?”
• You will set a good example of email clarity, brevity, and efficiency; hopefully others will follow.

7. Make emails visually easy to read. Use bullet points where appropriate and include spacing between paragraphs. Added white space allows the eye to move more easily and smoothly from one thought to another and helps the recipient assimilate your message.

I’m a fan of email. The good things about it are that it’s fast, sends the exact same message to every recipient, and records the conversation for future reference. The bad things about it are that it’s fast, sends the exact same message to every recipient, and records the conversation for future reference. So it has to be used with caution.

But love it or hate it, we’ve got it. We all are terrifically dependent on it. If a faculty member is using it to communicate critical, emotion-laden information, it’s important you respond thoughtfully and as quickly as you can.

If you need help working through a conflict with a coworker or supervisor, or have other work-related issues, you are encouraged to contact the UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson. All inquiries are confidential. More information on ombuds services and contact information can be found on my website: www.umkc.edu/facultyombuds.

Greetings! My name is Dr. Nancy E. Day, and I serve as UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson. I’ll be posting to this blog periodically to provide ideas and information to faculty about work-related issues.

Please visit the Faculty Ombuds website at www.umkc.edu/facultyombuds for more about what I do and who I am. Also, please feel free to comment on my blog posts!

We all love conflict, don’t we? The more, the better, right? It makes us more productive and totally on-our-toes. Who wouldn’t want to escalate a good conflict?

I hope you’ve figured out that as UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson, I’m kidding! Some conflict is good. We shouldn’t all agree on everything; in fact, productive conflict is a cornerstone of academic life. Healthy disagreement moves us forward in our thinking, helps liven up classroom discussions, and improves our research. However, the operative word here is “healthy.” When conflicts become counterproductive, time-wasting, or hurtful to important relationships, then it’s time to rethink the situation.

But in the interest of a good sarcastic rant, I’m going to borrow from a recent posting by Dr. Travis Bradberry (https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-win-argument-every-time-dr-travis-bradberry)  and list five tips to “escalate conflict” (remember, I’m kidding here – I’m the ombudsperson, after all).

1. Be brutally honest. Really, enough is enough. Lay it on the line. That will set him/her straight. You shouldn’t have to take this! Not only will you feel better – if only for about 30 seconds – s/he will recoil or lash back at you. Either way,  you’ve successfully edged the conflict forward.
2. Share your feelings. Robotically and freely. At all times. People want to know how you feel. When someone irritates you, immediately tell him, “I am feeling really irritated at you.” He will probably respond defensively, which is a good strategy to notch up the conflict.
3. Defend yourself. If she’s been brutally honest with you, you don’t have to take it either! Tell her why you’re right and she’s wrong. It’s a great way to accelerate the joyful rush of conflict.
4. Blame the other person. After all, it is obviously (maybe) his fault. Perhaps he doesn’t know this. And even if it’s not his fault, making him think you think that it is will drive the conflict-o-meter right up there where you want it.
5. Don’t say anything. Just worry about what would happen if you did speak up. This escalates the conflict since you can internally mull it over and over until the gleeful minute when you explode with tip #1.

So there you go! Five easy ways to escalate conflict to ensure a fun-packed, productive, and exciting workplace.

Seriously, these are often our ready responses to conflict.  We generally have poor societal role models showing how to manage conflict successfully. So consider the following options before you knee-jerk one of the five conflict-escalating behaviors:

1. Be honest, but not brutally. Think about making the conversation “safe” for both parties. That means ensuring the other person understands your motivation is to respond constructively. Tell your story in a way that allows the other person to retain self-respect and dignity.
2. Sharing feelings isn’t a bad thing. But sharing the facts first will help engage your – and your partner-in-conflict’s – cognitive faculties. It’s much easier for you both to agree on facts than whether feelings are justified or not.
3. Rather than defend yourself, catalyze your curiosity. As Dr. Bradberry says, “A great way to inoculate yourself against defensiveness is to develop a healthy doubt about your own certainty.”  Why would a rational person, which your partner-in-conflict probably is, say something that made you defensive? Some detective work on your part will engage the brain and disengage your emotions.
4. Rather than blaming the other person, figure out your role. Perhaps it really is the other person’s “fault,” but was the decision/statement/action justified in some way? What was your part in it? Again, it’s time to involve cognition, not emotions.
5. What will it cost you not to speak up? Hopefully, you’re getting the idea that indeed, it is possible to resolve conflicts through rational, respectful avenues – getting over a conflict hump can be done with a logical and cheerful open mind. Evaluate what it costs you, your work team, or your productivity to keep silent.

If you need help working through a conflict with a coworker or supervisor, or have other work-related issues, you are encouraged to contact the UMKC’s Faculty Ombudsperson. All inquiries are confidential. More information on ombuds services and contact information can be found on my website: www.umkc.edu/facultyombuds.