Was it good for you?

In today’s world, we are swimming in a hook-up culture. Between popular media and busy schedules, this type of “relationship” (also known as casual sex) has replaced traditional dating for today’s generation. Now that 91% pf college students have said they practice this style of dating, it begs some questions. Is this healthy? Is it mutually beneficial?

When the big screen depicts the traditional heterosexual “hook-up” both the male and female rush together in a fit of heated lust and then onlookers see them depicted in post-coital bliss. Is this reality though?

Studies show that a mere 40% of women orgasm during casual sex.

Is this because of the traditional belief that women need emotional connection with an intimate partner in order to feel turned-on?

Looking at the prevalence of “hook-up culture” this idea seems most unlikely.

Writer Danica Johnson at Everyday Feminism offers some insight on this phenomena. She argues that the enveloping culture surrounding hook-ups offers a male-centered view of sex that often leaves women less than thrilled. Is there still a benefit to hooking-up for women? Read the complete article here for more:

http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/06/inequality-in-hetero-hookups/

A Woman’s Worth

by Ayomide Aruwajoye

“Cause a real man knows a real woman when he sees her
And a real woman knows a real man ain’t afraid to please her
And a real woman knows a real man always comes first
And a real man just can’t deny a woman’s worth”

Alicia Keys – Woman’s Worth

I’m not sure if you have heard this song, but to all women and men, I feel like this is one of those songs that must be heard. This is a song that I grew up knowing. Everybody, especially the girls in my grade during elementary school, knew this song. I’m positive that we didn’t have a clue what this song meant since we were not yet in the dating stage, but since our mothers let us sing it around the house and we didn’t get in trouble at school for singing the song, we concluded that it was a good song.

[youtube]http://youtu.be/JtMUIwOE2ss[/youtube]

As I got older, especially when I was old enough to drive, I blasted this song in my car for months. It was my anthem. I loved the beat, her voice, but most of all the meaning of the song. A woman’s worth is more than two words put together that sounds pretty. A woman’s worth is something that all women are born with, and it places a status on how we should be treated.

Without knowing your worth you lack the motivation to be treated how you should be treated. A woman’s worth reminds you that you should not be getting paid less than men, rape is not something that is asked for regardless of the clothes you wear. Women shouldn’t go through sexual harassment, domestic violence, and basically that women should be treated right.

In the past, women did not know their worth and were told not to go to school and stay home to cook, clean, and take care of kids, they agreed to these things because they didn’t believe in themselves and their abilities. They were constantly being talked down to by men and I’m sure they had very low confidence levels.

This is why I believe all women should KNOW their worth. The way you feel about yourself can take you a long way. If it’s already established that you will not be treated less than a man, or called out your name, it’s more likely that people will respect that about you but also the fact that you won’t accept it makes you such a strong person.

There’s a saying, “it’s not what you are called it’s what you answer to!” this quote has a lot to do with the “knowing your worth” phenomenon. Young females today address themselves as Bitches and other disrespectful words. They sing along to songs that emotionally and physical attack females in a disgraceful way and think it is okay. For me, being a young adult in college is figuring out what my worth is and requiring to be treated that way or better, especially in my relationships.

The first step is figuring out what your worth is and how you want to be treated. Second step will be actually requiring to be treated exactly how you want to be. Third and final step would be realizing that your worth as a woman is undefinable, you are beautiful, smart, strong intelligent woman and nobody should treat you less than that because like Alicia Keys said, “You will lose if you choose to refuse to put her first. She will and she can find a man who knows her worth!”