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The Man Box

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By Devon White

In a recent TED video, Tony Porter discusses what it means — for men, women, sons, and daughters —when the social pressure of masculinity confines men.

“Growing up as a boy, we were taught that men had to be tough, had to be strong, had to be courageous, dominating — no pain, no emotions, with the exception of anger — and definitely no fear — that men are in charge, which means women are not; that men lead, and you should just follow and do what we say; that men are superior, women are inferior; that men are strong, women are weak; that women are of less value —property of men — and objects, particularly sexual objects” (“Tony Porter: A call to men“).

Porter gives these common socializations the moniker “The Man Box,” which contains all of the stereotypical, hyper-masculinized ways in which men are expected to behave and how those same expectations say volumes about how little our society values women and femininity. In this revealing speech, Porter shares a personal discussion that he had with a young athlete about how it would hypothetically feel if his football coach compared his playing skill to that of a girl in front of his teammates. The athlete responded that, “It would destroy me.” Porter draws a clear conclusion that if being compared to a girl would destroy this young man, what does it say about how our society views women’s worth?

In order for men to be active feminists, we must look inside ourselves to understand how our male privilege impacts how we value the women in our lives. Men need to peer inside of Porter’s “Man Box” and deconstruct the trappings of masculinity and the role it plays in women’s equity.

You can watch the entire TED video here. (Trigger warning: at about the 9-minute mark, there is a story about a sexual assault.)

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“TEDWomen-Tony Porter: A call to men.” Tony Porter: A call to men | Video on TED.com. Web. 23 Apr 2011.